ImageI was almost ready to sleep, but realized that exactly one month ago, probably at this same hour I was writing my first post for “notrunningout”. This means also that, exactly one month ago, my dad was diagnosed with cancer.

Today we came back from his hometown. I decided to go with mom and him, so he could visit grandma. He hasn’t been able to drive for long hours ( it is a three hour drive from where we live), for a long time. Sometimes I just kiss my grandma and leave to enjoy the west with friends. She is 94 years old and always in bed, but I love to see her smile, and grab her hands.

As we arrived yesterday we were gladly surprised with a Christmas celebration at the plaza, so I spent the evening with my parents. At first dad didn’t want to go, but afterwards we all had a great time. When you are sad or preoccupied, doing nice things does not come naturally. I have been there many times so I resisted a little as well, but a year from now, so many things can happen.

Today, as I was preparing to enjoy coffee at the ” plaza”, I noticed my dad’s concern in his face. I asked him bluntly if he was OK. Of course he said yes. I have hardly seen my dad cry in all my life and he has stayed strong for this month as well.

Tomorrow, ( I mean already today) we will visit the doctor and get to know the final diagnosis. At this moment I am not sure of many things and their outcome. One month ago, nothing seemed quite important as today.