I take out my clothing the day before work without fault. I even match my underwear. When I wake up my goal is to have enough time to grab a cup of coffee at the coffee shop and not be late to work. I strive to excel at what I do and when the day is done, I get in my car and hope there is no traffic to get back home.
He has taken great care of himself since I remember by eating well, doing exercise, taking vitamins every day. He is not a smoker or a drinker. Who knows, maybe it could have been worse if he wasn’t so conscious about his health, and maybe this has nothing to do with cancer.
Since the diagnosis some of his habits have changed. He wakes up every morning and spends 15 to 20 minutes at the stationary bicycle. He has always read the newspaper, and now is a combined effort; read while oxygenating the body. I have been giving him more hugs, more kisses. I have always been very understanding of how getting older is a challenge itself, but this one is quite different.
I am not in his shoes, have no clue of the many things that go on his mind and the scary places he might be visiting inside his heart. Cancer is a well known disease, its consequences too. It is not rare to see bald people more often at the X Ray offices we visit nowadays. Maybe they have always been there, but now I notice. I am sure their struggles are beyond my imagination.
Some of these things sound now to me as pure banality, because when someone you love has cancer, they are. My father, he wakes up and still does a lot of the things he did when he didn’t know about the diagnosis, but I am pretty sure he gets up and gets back to bed with only one thing in mind: to win the battle.